<\/p>\n
As if the aftermath of the explosion at the Studio 54 party wasn’t enough, Liz now has to figure out what to do with the six bunches of bananas Gary accidentally ordered when he thought he was ordering six. individual<\/em> banana. But until the bananas are ripe enough to make bread, she plans to focus on other issues. “I looked like a bitter, drunken witch,” she tells Dolores. I imagine these three words are also listed on the appearance notice for this show.<\/p>\n Meanwhile, Ashley takes the other women to her favorite beach, but Alicia, who is used to country clubs, is horrified. “This isn’t my vibe, I’m freaking out,” she whispers when she has to carry chairs, bags, and snacks. The snack in question is called “pizza chips,” and they’re just bread with sauce on them? Alicia, the brain behind Pizza Mamma, tries to explain the science to us by saying that cheese can’t be left out in the sun, but there’s no need to explain. She took me out for pizza chips.<\/p>\n She also looked out for me when I revealed that Lula apparently met Brian and Alicia when she was married to their high school Spanish teacher. “I don’t know if this is true, but Brian cheated on me with his first wife, my Spanish teacher,” she says, hand on her chest. Again, I’m obsessed with how deep the bond between these women is. Any game with a six-step difference hates to see them coming. I also love when Alicia starts her declarations with “I don’t know if this is true,” but next time she should say it in Spanish.<\/p>\n And speaking of those deep connections, we already know that Jo Ellen’s sister and Jo Ellen’s husband had some kind of connection when they were in high school before Jo Ellen swooped in. But now we finally got to meet Jen. Jen is basically filling in for Jo Ellen at home while she’s on the road. “She keeps having this fun little game of flirting with my husband,” Jo-Ellen explains, but assures us nothing is going on. That said, Jen has joked that they’re like an old married couple, and Jo Ellen has said that Jen hopes her sperm will have a baby…but other than that, I think everything is completely normal. I’m putting together a list of secondary characters who should be candidates to hold clams in future seasons, and so far Jen and Alicia’s Spanish teacher seem to be leading the way.<\/p>\n But when it comes to supporting characters, the real stars are, of course, Alicia’s aunts, who thankfully return on screen for a backyard barbecue with some of the ladies. What better group to be honest with Lula about her situation with Brian? The second Lula hints at the bumps in the road, and this scorned group of beautiful divorcees swoops in and invites Lula to leave. “Do you want to spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder?” one of them asked her, and in a confessional later, Lula admitted that those words stuck with her. We feel like we’re seeing something real about Lula, and she’s finally let the glossy veneer slip off. But the best comment came from Alicia’s mother. “I hope and pray that you hurt him in some way…I pray that you get him back.” Forget the usual Bravo aftershows, I want a show where all of Alicia’s aunts just watch and commentate on the weekly episodes. Ratings will be higher mash<\/em> Finale.<\/p>\n As for Liz and Kelsey’s smoldering conflict, the two finally meet up to clear the air at the water’s edge, where Liz’s boat is docked. I’ve seen similar meetings proceed exactly like this the sopranos<\/em>So I had to keep reminding myself that Kelsey was safe. Because Bravo never airs women being murdered. Once again, this will be a glass ceiling-shattering show. As it turns out, sitting down goes incredibly smoothly, so I didn’t need to worry. Liz explains that she felt like Kelsey was co-signing the rumor by bringing it up, and Kelsey says that Liz’s instinct to distance herself from Dino actually has to do with her own history. She explained that she dated Dino ten years ago but it didn’t work out, and now his presence reminds her of a time in her life that she is trying to forget. She even said she suffered from PTSD from it and now avoids him like the plague, but respects that Liz has a meaningful friendship with him. There are still a lot of questions about this, but eventually Liz and Kelsey clear the air and reconcile.<\/p>\n And thank God. That way they can ride the rail bike with peace of mind. The women all split up into groups, drinks in hand, of course, and cycled three miles down the old railroad tracks. \u201cLulala, how are you up there?\u201d Alicia asked as we rode, and I squealed with joy as I heard my new favorite word again: \u201cLulala.\u201d That’s my mantra. Say it at least 50 times a day. It is a greeting, a prayer, and a way of life. Even better, when the camera switched to Lula, she finally won me over. Halfway through the cycle, she shakes the cocktail shaker and pours the tequila into a wine glass. Leave Brian and his shit at home this<\/em> She’s the woman I want to see on screen.<\/p>\n When they get to their place, I become even more infatuated with her and she is appalled to learn of Alicia’s financial situation. Lula, a financial planner, takes immediate action when she tells women they feel unimportant because their husbands won’t put their names on their homes or businesses. It’s a great look to see her smart and strong side, especially as she tries to empower Alicia, and it’s much more convincing than watching her meekly defend her cheating husband. It’s a glimpse of what an independent Lula might look like on this show in a few seasons.<\/p>\n But Alicia isn’t the only one supporting her. Kelsey comes forward to play Billy in a role play so Alicia can practice venting her frustrations. Side note: Everyone talks about how these women look alike, but the real problem is that the partners all have very similar names. Alicia’s boyfriend is Billy, Kelsey’s boyfriend is Bill, Lula’s boyfriend is Brian, Joe Ellen’s boyfriend is Gary, Liz’s boyfriend is Jerry, Ashley’s boyfriend is Jared, and thankfully Rosie’s boyfriend is just Rich. But my god, how do I keep it all honest? Anyway, the little role-play that Alicia does becomes emotional and ultimately heartbreaking as he makes her feel like their relationship is worthless. But the fact that we’re talking about this this much feels hopeful, and I hope we get to see Alicia finally bring all these feelings to Billy. If he doesn’t listen, I hope her aunts will attack him.<\/p>\n The conversation then shifts to how Liz gets along with newcomer Ashley, and they joke about how Ashley is a little scared of her. When the subject of the Studio 54 party came up, Liz said it wasn’t her finest moment and didn’t really represent who she really is. “Alicia, she always said that,” Rosie said, throwing Alicia under the bus. “Don’t flip that, don’t do that to me, don’t put your shit in my mouth,” Alicia shoots back while Dolores looks on like a proud mother. “She twisted my words, you son of a bitch,” Alicia screamed as Rosie violated her. It’s a line-o-rama of iconic outbursts: “Welcome to Rhode Island, bitch, this is how we roll,” then “Fucking thirsty bitch, so thirsty and scary,” and finally, “I gotta get out of here ’cause I’m gonna kill her.” First death threat!<\/p>\n But the craziest part of this happens when Alicia and Rosie briefly separate from the group. It’s said to be a side note, but I was convinced it was so Alicia could kill her with fewer witnesses. Alicia tells her that everything will be fine if Rosie apologizes, and Rosie apologizes. “Did she just hug her?” someone from within the circle asks, shocked. There have been a lot of great moments in this series so far, but this is the one that shows the most longevity as a series. housewife<\/em> show. The secret sauce of these shows is resilience. That is, the ability to be as angry as humanly possible at someone, then recover as if nothing happened and try again. Long-lasting grudges worsen the quality of television ( donkey<\/em> ), this cast’s ability to reconcile and move on will make this production great.<\/p>\n